“BE A MAN!” started with the Dylan Mulvaney Bud Light controversy. I couldn’t believe how quickly people turned something as simple as a beer can into a debate about masculinity. The song is about the overlooked power of women, and it calls out the stereotypes that tell men they have to be tough, dominant, or threatened by femininity to be considered “real men.” At its core, it asks us to rethink what being a man actually means, and why empowering women was ever treated like a threat.

I let a breakup affect me for way longer than I should have. For a while, I was stuck in my own head, comparing myself, picking apart everything I did wrong, and wondering why I wasn’t enough. “Greener” came from the moment I finally realized I was doing fine without him. Somewhere along the way, the song became less about the breakup and more about getting over the version of myself that ever thought I needed him in the first place.

I was tired of people acting like every chaotic decision I made had to be some guy’s influence, instead of believing I could make those choices myself. “Voodoo Barbie” pokes fun at the naive, innocent version of me people created in their heads, while I’m saying, “I can speak for myself, and yes, sometimes I’m the problem.” It’s about taking back credit for my own voice, mistakes, and personality instead of being reduced to somebody’s girlfriend or a doll controlled by a man.

My person was still in Chicago and I was here in Nashville, waiting for the day we could finally live in the same place, when I wrote “Castle in Tennessee.” It’s a song about loving someone enough to make the distance feel temporary, even when you’re counting down the days between visits and waiting for money and timing to work out. More than anything, it’s about having a person who already feels like home before the two of you actually get to build one together.

“Fraud” is about slowly realizing that someone you trusted was manipulating you, and how much that can mess with your head even after the relationship is over. A big part of the song is the point where you stop making excuses for them, stop giving them another chance, and finally admit that what they were doing wasn’t love. It’s really about the psychological aftermath, and learning to trust your own judgment again after someone made you question it for so long.

Someone I thought was my friend completely disappeared, avoided having an adult conversation, and let their parents fight their battles for them. What hurt most wasn’t being ghosted. It was having my character attacked by their mom while the person I actually had the friendship with stayed silent. “Crying to Your Mother” is about fake people, lack of accountability, and how bizarre it is to be grown and still have someone else speak for you when things get uncomfortable.

“Dear Devon” comes from the anger I felt after being assaulted and sexualized at such a young age, and finally realizing how many years I’d spent carrying the damage quietly. Those experiences changed everything: the way I saw myself, the way I dressed, the way I performed, and even how safe I felt just existing in public. This song is me finally refusing to keep protecting the people who hurt me, saying his name, and taking back a voice I spent years being too scared to use.

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Seven songs that are just me whining about the patriarchy

Thanks for listening :)

— Mary Jo